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Cuntfessions: The Push Toward Classlessness–Or At Least Gaucheness–Continues With Michael Kors Buying Versace

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Just as fashion has reflected the aims of the current generation with a push toward genderless clothing, so, too has it sought to mirror the aspiration of a classless society (which will always be impossible so long as white men who come from a trust fund exist). With this in mind, the recent rebranding of such formerly haughty in their …

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Death to Preppies: Even J. Crew is Re-Branding to Tailor Itself to Poors a.k.a. People Who Live in the World

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Like so many companies of late that have had to face a “slight retooling” in order to keep up with these increasingly easily offended times (whether that means being more “all-inclusive” in terms of sizing and genderlessness), J. Crew is the latest to fall prey to that thing that has been kind to some and merciless to others: le vingt-et-unième siècle. …

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Cuntfessions: Someone Must Be Boning–It’s Just Not You– Because STD Rates Are Up

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For some reason, despite the general overall feeling that everyone in America at present might be a libido-less eunuch (see: the gaming community), a fresh report on STDs in the United States from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has somehow found that rates for sexually transmitted diseases are at an all-time high. Up over 200,000 more cases …

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Cuntfessions: There’s A Target in the East Village Now & Other Metaphors

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Will keeping apprised of the constant changes in New York only and always result in mourning what it used to be? Even and especially if you never really experienced it at its now overly romanticized peak, 1980-82 (once Madonna got legitimately famous in ’83, everything was over). How you used to look at it as you might your first love …

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Cuntfessions: Sex Is Starting to Feel Like It’s Changing in the Same Way Credit Cards Are

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Time has passed in such a way that, like the Gen Xers and baby boomers before millennials, it’s gotten to the point where “nostalgia” (that word that suggests things were better in the past when in fact, as Proust put it, “Remembrance of things past is not necessarily the remembrance of things as they were”) has led us to wax …

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Cuntfessions: Good Dick Will Imprison You, Or at Least Mildly Adequate Dick is Prompting Ariana Grande to Turn a Blind Eye

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Because one can’t be famous without some recompense (being rich and attractive, after all, isn’t without its tradeoff of being largely hated), Ariana Grande has been the subject of much contempt of late in her hypocrisy for dating/being engaged to mostly previously unknown before banging her (or Cazzie David for that matter) Pete Davidson. In contrast, Davidson has argued via …

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You Can Go Shave Your Back Now: Page Six Has the Gall to Tell The Olsen Twins They Should Smile More in Photos

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While we’re all well aware that anything the New York Post does is going to be completely tone deaf a result of its natural conservatism as mandated by Rupert Murdoch, there were some articles we never could have imagined being published in 2018, chief among them one about Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen–in “honor” of their birthday on June 13 no …

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Cuntfessions: Da Vinci, Others Rolling in Grave Over Jay-Z and Beyoncé’s “Apeshit” Video

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While it is always considered sacrilege to decry or insult anything put out by Beyoncé and/or Jay-Z, some of us must be the lone wolf in taking that risk. And with the release of their only visual accompaniment thus far for Everything Is Love, “Apeshit,” we must ask ourselves, would the artists paraded for the sport and narcissistic benefit of Jay-Z …

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Stefano Gabbana & The Privilege of Gay Male Fashion Designers: Calling Women Ugly

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As though to coincide with Madonna’s latest Steven Klein-directed advert for MDNA Skin assuring us, “The perception of beauty is all an opinion, and opinions come and go,” Stefano Gabbana’s recent comments about Selena Gomez’s lack of beauty–to be more specific, “è proprio brutta”–are in keeping with an age-old privilege of gay male fashion designers: laying down their uncensored assessments …

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(Cuntfessions): Troye Sivan and Ariana Grande’s Duet Kind of Makes You Want to Vomit

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Just when you thought you were all stocked up on summer anthems between Drake’s “Nice For What” and Ariana Grande’s “No Tears Left to Cry,” among others, the latter sneaks her way in again via Troye Sivan and his latest single, “Dance to This.” Not necessarily intended to have a similar baiting title as Steal This Book, “Dance To This” …

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(Cuntfessions) Miss Congeniality Has Gone Too Far: On the Miss America Pageant’s “Retooling”

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It would be a proud day indeed for one, Gracie Lou Freebush a.k.a. Gracie Hart (Sandra Bullock), to learn that the Miss America pageant has eliminated the key aspects of what constitutes conventional beauty: the swimsuit and evening wear portions. And while former Miss America winner Mallory Hagan might have a point about the “fat-shaming” ridiculousness of being able to …

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J. Lo Switches Track in Her Assurance of “Love Don’t Cost A Thing” to Yo Quiero “Dinero”

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While the early 00s might have been a far more concrete example of a time when the U.S. was clinging as best as it could to the excesses it enjoyed in the 80s and 90s, Jennifer Lopez chose to go the “Can’t Buy Me Love” route of The Beatles’ pre-antiwar driven 60s with the repackaged sentiment, “Love Don’t Cost A …

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The Sinister Nature of Kate Spade Sayings In the Wake of Her Suicide

In Fashion by Genna Rivieccio1 Comment

Kate Spade (who annoyingly would make you spell her brand in all lower cases–as in kate spade new york–and I only know this thanks to the treachery of writing copy for it) was a designer always noted for her upbeatness and vibrancy. Colorful patterns and “tongue-in-cheek” phrases that were never too unpleasant so much as just abrasive enough–most notably, “Eat …

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“Humility” Video From Gorillaz Offers a Vibe As “Californian” (Read: Mindless) As the Tone of the Song

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Gorillaz has always been known for their occasional veerings toward the style of “chillwave” (the miraculously not spelled with a “z” at the end “Empire Ants” featuring Little Dragon being one of the best sonic examples). And with the upcoming release of The Now Now, the animated quartet consisting of 2-D, Russel Hobbs, Noodle and, at present, Ace (filling in …

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Parallel Existences Add to One’s Eerie Stay at the Tranquility Base Hotel in Video for Arctic Monkeys’ “Four Out of Five”

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As far as the “concept album” goes, it seemed the music industry had given up on it altogether until Arctic Monkeys decided to release the piano-heavy (and therefore out of character for the band) Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino on May 11th. Marking the band’s first record since 2013’s AM, the abrupt shift in sonic tone, as well as thematic …

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Christina Aguilera’s Latest, “Fall In Line,” Builds on Themes of Stripped’s “Beautiful” & “Can’t Hold Us Down”

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For over a decade now, Christina Aguilera has essentially coasted on the “artistic merit” of 2002’s “Beautiful” (as there is nothing of the kind to be found in being a judge on a reality show), immortalized in Mean Girls by Damian’s (Daniel Franzese) talent show performance. As one of her most “serious” singles (even garnering the honors of GLAAD), the …

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Sex and the City Isn’t As Irrelevant As Its Current Detractors (Sarah Jessica Parker Included) Are Making It Out to Be

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As even Sarah Jessica Parker cowers to the juggernaut of gender fluidity and racial inclusivity that has rendered all pop culture offerings of the past utterly obsolete, one can’t deny that there are still many beacons of truth contained within the show that made daft white girls everywhere want to move to New York. And yes, Carrie Bradshaw (Parker) was the …

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Rita Ora’s “Girls” Is Neither A Fitting Homage to “Lady Marmalade” Nor Genuine In Its Fair-weather Bisexuality

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Long ago, during a time when George W. Bush was coming to the twilight of his presidency and presumably thinking about, well, not much of anything at all, Katy Perry was rattling conservative cages with something that was somehow still too salacious for mainstream consumption: two women kissing. Later, when we would find out that the narrative was inspired by Miley …

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The Disgust One Feels Over Grimes’ Concession to Dating Elon Musk

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Grimes (Christian name Claire Boucher) has never been known for folding to the what one would call the pressures of dating a douchebag once you become something of a pop star. Though she began as an under the radar MySpace musician starting in 2007, the level to which Vancouver’s own has ascended from lo-fi urchin to electronic powerhouse has been …